Jun 15

A constant reminder of need

Originally written as a blog post for Arthr in 2020, I share what I have learnt about my life with arthritis, the unhealthy relationship I previously had with the disease, and the adjustments I needed to make to live with it. — An uninvited companion Arthritis has a funny way of reminding you of its presence. Having lived with the disease in numerous evolving forms for approximately 25 of my 36 years, it's never far from my mind.

Arthritis

6 min read

May 25

I am…pain

A poem about a life lived in pain due to chronic illness. — I am strong until I’m not, I am cold, but my joints burn hot. I am happy, on the surface, I am not fit but for what purpose? I can love, but not myself, Not yet dying, but don’t have my health. I am travelling but in one direction, Followed by…

Pain

1 min read

May 9

The loneliness of a parent in pain — a mental health awareness week special

“I want to stay at home with you, daddy; I don’t want you to be sad.” These were the words my three year old said to me this morning as we both burst into tears at the bottom of the stairs. Today is the start of Mental Health Awareness Week, and this year’s theme is loneliness. So I wanted to share my experience this morning. …

Mental Health

3 min read

May 6

The distorted logic of depression

I’ve never found any answers at the bottom of a can But it often feels better than the pain, The turmoil and the rough touch of times passing hand. I’ve never seen clearer through the powder of those extra pills. It’s the wave of numbness — disconnect. …

Poem

1 min read

Apr 28

Why am I sad?

Written in the summer of 2021, I explore the topic of depression - the emptiness, the randomness and the absence of a ‘magic bullet’. — It’s been some time since I wrote anything that wasn’t a poem or a social media post. And that’s telling in itself. I’ve been struggling over the last few weeks with what I can only assume is depression. There is no rhyme or reason to it. I have nothing to…

Depression

9 min read

Apr 24

The flicker, the flame, and the pain

You can lower the blinds, And tell the world ‘sorry, I’m closed’. Light candles, if you prefer. Are you the burn? Or dream of dancing like the flame? I am the wax; are you the wane? You can take all the drugs, Numb yourself until a kinder time. Compost in bed with the misery. Or fire up that angry song, The one that fueled your youth. Run headfirst into the pain. Time is fixed, But not all time is spent the same.

Pain

1 min read

The flicker, the flame, and the pain

You can lower the blinds,
And tell the world ‘sorry, I’m closed’.
Light candles, if you prefer.

Are you the burn?
Or dream of dancing like the flame?
I am the wax; are you the wane?

You can take all the drugs,
Numb yourself until a kinder time.
Compost in bed with the misery.

Or fire up that angry song,
The one that fueled your youth.
Run headfirst into the pain.

Time is fixed,
But not all time is spent the same.

Please consider hitting the ‘follow’ button if you’ve enjoyed Joel’s words or support what he’s trying to achieve. It costs nothing but makes a big difference in helping people find their work.

You can also find Joel on:

Facebook / Twitter / Instagram / Twitch

Or for a full list: https://linktr.ee/Joelvsarthritis

Published in Chronic Pain Club

·Apr 11

What we started, you and I

A poem about insomnia, depression and how pain can often be the spark for both. What we started, you and I, Could never be controlled. For a deluded rare moment, the reigns were mine alone to hold. But as pain dug in its claws, Dark clouds began to form. They roll in…

Poem

2 min read

Apr 8

We grow where others cannot stand

A poem about living with disability and long-term health conditions. — We are limited. We are disappointed. We are set back. We are frustrated And disadvantaged; We are stifled, often flat. We can be disabled, Cut down, Dealt an unfair hand… But we continue to grow where others could not stand. Please consider hitting the ‘follow’ button if you’ve enjoyed Joel’s words or support what he’s trying to achieve. It costs nothing but makes a big difference in helping people find his work.

Poem

1 min read

We grow where others cannot stand

A poem about living with disability and long-term health conditions.

We are limited.
We are disappointed.
We are set back.

We are frustrated
And disadvantaged;
We are stifled, often flat.

We can be disabled,
Cut down,
Dealt an unfair hand…

But we continue to grow where others could not stand.

You can also find Joel on:

Facebook / Twitter / Instagram / Twitch

Or for a full list: https://linktr.ee/Joelvsarthritis

Published in Move Me Poetry

·Apr 7

The biggest hole from the smallest of things

This house feels empty. Somehow, twice as big. The void from the noise, the presence, the ball of energy that has always seemed to exist. Now you are gone; it's the things that drove me insane that I seem to miss. …

Grief

2 min read

The biggest hole from the smallest of things

Mar 23

Weight of burden

The sun is out, Spring has sprung, And I'm trapped between the wanting, And the what can't be done. The will is there, But my body, it rots. Yesterday a reminder of what I had, But have no longer got. And so I wait, Weight of burden. Explanations taste bitter, From all the times I have spoken them. The day is gone. The pain has won. And I'm trapped between the wanting, And the what can't be done. Please consider hitting the ‘follow’ button if you’ve enjoyed Joel’s words or support what he’s trying to achieve. It costs nothing but makes a big difference in helping people find his work.

Poem

1 min read